Monday, October 29, 2007

Changing it Up

I was ready for a change of scenery. Recently, two of my friends who blog changed their templates, which inspired me go ahead and do the same. I needed the change. Three of my other blogging friends had the same template I was using, so I get to see it a lot.



If you get these updates via e-mail, maybe this will inspire you to check out the site. If you only check the site, maybe you'll be inspired to get the e-mail updates (scroll all the way down and subscribe through Feedblitz).



When I changed my template, I noticed that I started out really strong, and I've progressively posted fewer and fewer times each month: 33, 21, 15, 7. If the trend continues, November doesn't look promising, and you shouldn't expect to hear a peep out of me in December. What's going on? Why am I not writing as much?



Something I've been meaning to write about and haven't is what's going on in Uganda and how you could participate if you're so led. John Michael and Evah Mugerwa oversee the orphanage/boarding school in Uganda where I spent six months teaching. They showed us a 3-minute DVD tonight of the improvements that have been made. I didn't recognize it. So much has happened in 4 years. They are excellent stewards of the funds they receive. They live humbly so that hundreds may live well.



Check them out here: http://destinyschooluganda.com/

Award-winning Book/Upcoming Movie

In the past three days, I've received e-mails from my friends Dena, Amanda, and Isa that look something like this:

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"You may already know about the kids’ movie coming out in December starring Nicole Kidman. It's called The Golden Compass, and while it will be a watered-down version, it is based on a series of children's books about killing God (It is the anti-Narnia). Please follow this link and then pass it on. From what I understand, the hope is to get a lot of kids to see the movie--which won't seem too bad--and then get the parents to buy the books for their kids for Christmas. The quotes from the author sum it all up. I hope it totally bombs because we were all paying attention!"

http://snopes.com/politics/religion/compass.asp
***


A few months ago, I received an e-mail from my friend Kevin about a series of award-winning books he had just completed. He's an avid reader, a social activist, and a fellow Believer. This was my first introduction to the trilogy His Dark Materials by Phillip Pullman and the upcoming movie The Golden Compass that's slated to make its debut December 7, 2007.

Since my friend Kevin tends to be a very liberal radical (and not one to "throw out the baby with the bathwater"), I took his mini-book review pretty seriously and plan to avoid going to see the upcoming film based on the first (and least controversial) of Pullman's three books.

When my girlfriend Becki and I were in Borders bookstore last Thursday night, it was impossible to avoid the marketing of this trilogy. Here's Kevin's review if you're interested:


***

A Book Review by my friend Kevin:


I just finished up a series of books by Phillip Pullman, an atheist in Britain, that I wish I'd never started. Didn't know he was a militant atheist. He actually wrote it as his answer to CS Lewis. He combines science with a hate for the Catholic Church, Wiccan thought, Gnostic heresies, Chinese mysticism, and Greek mythology to tell a hell of a young adult story to brainwash kids that God is dead and never really deserved their love anyway.


It was such a compelling story that I couldn't put it down even when I realized I'd been had about halfway through the final third book. The worst thing is that the first book is being made into a movie with Nicole Kidman in December. If we thought Harry Potter was bad, this is gonna be awful. I was even doubting my faith in God during the third book. Just imagine what this could do to a young 12-year-old mind.


In the books, each character from one of the key worlds has a daemon which is like a pet that can change into any animal. As the story progresses, you discover that the daemon is like an external spirit or concsience (think of having half your mind outside your body). That by itself is not bad. What is bad is that the word is pronounced like "demon." Even now, the website-- http://www.goldencompassmovie.com/ -- helps kids take a test to find their own inner daemon/demon animal.


I'm going to write a full review for parents of faith and e-mail it as a warning to everyone of faith. This isn't just a threat to Christian beliefs, but to every monotheistic faith. I'll need you to send it to your contacts to warn parents to not even let their kids see this movie, because in the first book, there is really no threat (except for vague references to the control of the church and one evil group inside the church) and it sucks you in powerfully. I was trembling and crying during one scene when the main girl was nearly separated from her daemon.


In the third book, the young boy and girl meet the "Ancient of Days" (the first angel who claimed to be God) just before he dies of old age, and his second in command, a Lucifer-like character, is thrown into the abyss by the girl's parents, who are a sociopath and borderline themselves . Then a nun-turned-scientist who we met in the second book becomes the kids mentor as they fall in love in new Eden. I counted four times on one page of her lecture to the kids where she states "Once I realized God doesn't exist..." Total brainwash material.


As a journalist and a radical, I hate book burning--but this is one of the very few I'd gladly toss on the flames. It's only point is to tell kids that God doesn't exist and that the best thing they can do with their lives is to fall in love and do good things. According to the story, having good stories to tell the Harpies that guard hell is how you escape to go on to "nothingness" after you die--except that is really a good thing because then your atoms can be part of the universe!

***

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Perspective

I've had a really rough couple of days with my 3-year-old. I actually sat down on his bedroom floor yesterday and cried. And cried. And cried. Today I called my husband in utter frustration, and he came home early from work to help me navigate this new territory (and protect Judah and me from each other).

[James wants me to put a transition in this spot so the paragraphs above and below don't seem to be connected. To be perfectly honest, however. . . Did I think about throwing my kid today? Yes. Did I act on it? No. I told him to stay put, I found the phone, I called my husband, and I went back upstairs after walking outside and taking several deep breaths. Very shortly afterward (and while Judah and I were making amends as we sat and cuddled together), a friend came over with her son. Not long after that, James arrived home. S.O.S. successful. I think that's one of the keys to parenting (and not hurting your children)].

I received an e-mail a while back about a friend of a friend whose baby (less than a year old) was thrown by the baby sitter. He suffered a severe head injury and has been hospitalized for several weeks. Since her initial e-mail, I've been checking Baby Hinton Meyer's "care page" every now and then. Tonight it reads:

October 24, 2007 at 08:15 PM EDT
Hinton had another busy day. He is doing such a better job with his sleeping. Most nights he sleeps in his crib until at least 2 am and then he wants to be held, but he settles right down once we pick him up and he sleeps well in our arms. Thankfully we are able to safely hold him and nod off to with the help of pillows and things.

Hinton worked so hard again in therapy. I just can't believe how far his head control has come. He really holds it steady and it is amazing! He still gets really tired and lets it drop, but he can hold his head up for several minutes at a time. A big improvement that Hinton is making is in bringing his arms and hands together in the middle of his body. You'll remember that we are really worried about the tone (muscle tightening in Hinton's arms and hands), so bringing his hands together is a sign that the tone is improving. He is also getting better at opening his hands from the fist position and reaching for toys. He continues to improve with eating and is showing more and more interest in his food. Today Hinton took a ride on his stander and he went out of the peds rehab unit all the way down the adult rehab hall. He held his head up while doing it! He did great!

One area that Hinton needs to improve on is in ring sitting. Ring sitting is sitting on the floor with support and legs crossed. Hinton much prefers sitting in a lap or with his legs stretched out straight in front of him. We are sure that in time he will master this skill too.

I forgot to mention that Hinton's pressure wound on the back of his neck has greatly improved. He doesn't have to wear a bandage at all anymore. Yippee!

Today in conference we learned that Hinton is still on target for a Nov. 14 discharge date. We can't believe that is only 3 weeks away. The reconstruction surgery plan is still in the works. We will keep you posted on that.

We just can't thank you all enough for the prayers and support. Each prayer is felt; each message/card is read; each meal is enjoyed; each gift is appreciated; each donation is gratefully received. Each of you is supporting us in so many ways and we just can't thank you enough. We are a blessed family. Love-Melissa, Kevin and Hinton

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It breaks my heart to think about my baby girl not being able to hold her head up for more than a few minutes at a time--or having to live in a hospital for weeks at a time. Reading about what other people are struggling with often helps me gain perspective. It rarely makes it easier, but it does put my issues in perspective.

Interestingly enough, I received an e-mail just now from Rolland & Heidi Baker of Iris Ministries (I rarely receive updates from them). Their e-mail makes me SO thankful for the state of my life right now. You can read about their latest news and emergency call to prayer HERE.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Exciting Stuff this Weekend

This is too cool! I read my "5 minutes of caring" e-mail today from Cool People Care, and on their advertising banner I see: Jake Smith performing with Anthony Skinner, Saturday, October 27, Edgehill Studios, 9:30 p.m./"We're having a book launch party and you're invited." Crazy!!! Woo Hoo!!!

We're HUGE fans of Anthony Skinner, and we saw Jake Smith perform during a little backyard birthday shindig a few months back. If we can find a sitter, we're going. If we can't find a sitter, the kids might just have to sleep on the floor (like they did at Grace Center this past Sunday night when John and Carol Arnott were visiting).

Anthony is also going to be at The Foundry this Friday night. I went with a friend last Friday, and I'm hoping to make it a regular thing. If you're interested in joining me and want to know what it looks like, Click HERE and read "The Vision" by Scott MacLeod and "A Zadok Experience" by Victoria Hill.

James took me to Kidz Club for our first date over 8 years ago, and even though I haven't been involved there over the past 8 years, 8 is the number of New Beginnings. I now live 4.5 miles from Provision's humble warehouse home. I'm definitely sensing a draw there in this new season.

Here's their little blurb about Friday nights:

Experience "The Meltdown" this Friday @ 7PM, with Anthony Skinner and band!

Where creativity, compassion, and coffee meet together!

The Foundry has been newly renovated, updated, and upgraded...you have to see it to believe it!

Nashville's longest standing Christian coffee house/music venue/outreach center is ready to relaunch with all night worship and a new cafe'! It's been 14 years since the work in The Foundry first began. This old historic brick foundry, built in 1912, has been a spiritual and creative watering hole for literally thousands of people over the years.

Where? 1419 Clinton Street Nashville , TN 37203
Friday Night Foundry! Directions!

Get in the on the action -- Ask about opportunities to serve the poor in Nashville!

Check out the sound of the Foundry... www.foundrysongs.com

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Beautiful Cape Breton

We took a trip to beautiful Nova Scotia, Canada.
Judah enjoyed rolling down the hills. . . spotting moose. . .
throwing rocks in the ocean. . .
and running along the trails through the forest at Shushan.

We stayed at a spiritual retreat center in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, Canada, called Shushan. I loved walking through the woods alone. Little else is as refreshing to me. On the final night of our trip, we spent hours in the Selah hall, which is their "Wooing Place." Those who enter are invited to pursue the Lord with the intent to romance or woo. Oh, so much freedom was found in that place. I could have spent hours there every night.

More pictures can be found here, but during our visit to the beach, I dropped my camera in the sand (twice) and it quit working midway through our trip, so I'll have to download some of my friends' pictures and add them to my collection.

Friday, October 5, 2007

Nova Scotia, here we come!

In less than 12 hours our four-member family will be on a plane heading toward Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, and returning next Friday, October 12. We like to celebrate the entire month of October (our anniversary, in-laws' anniversary, my birthday, James' birthday, my sister's birthday, my nephew's birthday, then my brother-in-law's birthday is Nov. 1--and I've probably forgotten someone). This is something of an anniversary trip. I've been pretty consumed with preparing to leave, so no new posts and relatively few e-mails this week. Hopefully, I'll have plenty to write about next week and lots of beautiful pictures to share. Adios!

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Brain Talk

After hearing Carole Joy Seid speak on Saturday, I've been tooling around on the Internet looking at some of the sources she cited and basically making sure they all say what she claimed. That probably says a lot about me. Anyway, I read the first chapter of Jane M. Healy's Endangered Minds on the Internet today.

Healy is an educational psychologist and teacher who has written at length about current brain research. The book begins:

"Kids' brains must be different these days," I remarked half jokingly as I graded student essays in the faculty room late one afternoon.

"If I didn't think it was impossible, I would agree with you," chimed in a colleague who had experienced a particularly frustrating day with his English classes. "These kids are so sharp, but sometimes I think their minds are different from the ones I used to teach. I've had to change my teaching a lot recently, and I still wonder how much they're learning. But a human brain is a human brain. They don't change much from generation to generation — do they?"

"Changing brains?" mumbled a math teacher, putting on her coat. "Maybe that accounts for it."


And so began Healy's quest to discover if the brains of children are actually different today from those of years past. Absolutely fascinating reading.

Seid suggested at the home school seminar that television viewing actually causes brain damage. She said that research conducted by neurologists served as the catalyst for the American Academy of Pediatric's statement in 1999 recommending that children under 2 years of age not watch any television or videos.

In 1995 I attempted to write a paper for my communications class in college proving that television was detrimental to children, but I couldn't find enough research to support my theory. I ended up changing my paper to focus on the so-called "benefits" of educational television (I didn't believe a word of it, but I made the concession in order to write a well-researched and documented essay).

Since we've been married (eight years on October 7!), James and I have never owned a television. I've tried as much as possible not to expose Judah to television, and I refrained from showing him videos until his 2nd birthday. I knew about the moral implications, the attention-span connections, the tendency toward violent and aggresive behavior, etc., but I didn't make the brain "damage" connection until this week. I re-read the AAP warning and noticed their positive spin, which implies brain damage, but focuses on healthy brain development:

Here's the AAP recommendation:
Pediatricians should urge parents to avoid television viewing for children under the age of 2 years. Although certain television programs may be promoted to this age group, research on early brain development shows that babies and toddlers have a critical need for direct interactions with parents and other significant care givers (eg, child care providers) for healthy brain growth and the development of appropriate social, emotional, and cognitive skills. Therefore, exposing such young children to television programs should be discouraged.
(bold type mine--see the spin?)

Interestingly enough, a friend whose daughter participates in research at Vanderbilt e-mailed me with this yesterday:

"I got a pamphlet explaining the results of one of the experiments she was involved with. One day they came and showed her a video of someone playing with a toy, then came back the next day to see how she would play with it. (See if she would learn from the video how to use it.) Turns out that kids that watched the video (with repetition in it) understood how to play with it better than kids that didn't receive any instruction on the toys, but did not understand it as well as kids that watched a live person play with it only once. Interesting. Real-life, hands-on is a better teacher than watching something over and over on TV. I'm sure that doesn't surprise you."

This is exactly what Healy focuses on in the second chapter of her book. She says, "As we shall see in the next chapter, the power of children's brains can indeed be increased by good nutrition, adult companionship, and the stimulation of active play, toys, books, and games."

Basically, if you turn off media and spend time with your kids reading aloud (and don't stop when they learn to read--continue to read aloud even through high school), listening to them work out their ideas (let your little ones finish their sentences--don't interrupt them), showing them how to use paint or clay or instruments, taking them on walks, holding them and cuddling with them, feeding them nutritious fare (don't sweat it if they won't always eat what you're eating--and don't feed them junk just to get them to eat something--they'll eat the good stuff when they're hungry), teaching them to do all the stuff you do around the house and in the yard, and investing in them with your time and attention, your child will be well above average.

According to Healy, only 10% of Americans are reading 80% of the books. If you want your kids to be in the top 10%, turn off the TV and get into a good book. Oh, and don't worry about whether or not they're sitting down to read. Let them get up, move about, use their hands. As long as they're quiet, they're benefitting. And perhaps they will be among our nation's--and our world's--leaders.

I've been told by complete strangers on several different occasions that Judah is a mini Winston Churchill, that he's going to be a politician, that he's going to bring about great change. His middle name means, "one who enacts social change." Charles Stock prophesied over him before he was born, "Praise, proclamation, joy, and social change." When I think about Martin Luther King, Jr., I think of how eloquent he was. He put words to the great struggle for equality. If not for his great speeches, his letters, his life, where might we be?

Yesterday's Nap

Yesterday I put Miriam down for a nap and came downstairs to check e-mail and get directions to Lucy Rizzo's cooking class (James and I went together as a date night while Gloria Isaacks watched the kids--it was awesome!) Judah (who was "all dressed up") sat down next to me, rested his head on the couch, and then. . .
After I took a couple pictures, I removed the hat, scarf, and boots, and laid him on the couch. James put Judah in the car when he got home from work--still asleep. It wasn't until we reached Franklin that he woke up--happy. What a kid.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Oh, the places he'll SLEEP






Home School Mama in the Making

Yesterday I attended a 7-hour home schooling seminar. A friend sent me an e-mail about it months ago with this message, "I highly recommend this seminar! It's the best homeschool one I've ever been to. I wish I'd heard it when my kids were as young as yours." So I sent the kids to hang with Daddy, wrote a check for $53, and sat for hours listening to Carole Joy Seid, a veteran home school mom, former public and Christian school teacher, educational consultant, and conference speaker discuss her home school philosophies and strategies.

I've been asked by countless friends and neighbors about home schooling Judah. I figure if my public-assistance-receiving, television-watching, video-game-playing, public-school-attending neighbors are asking me about home schooling, then I'm probably a strong candidate. It's not like they have home schooling experience and want to share their wisdom. They just know that I'm not "normal" and they think that Judah is so smart because he talks so much, and they figure I'll probably go against the grain on this one, as well. Without really trying, I'm living a pretty counter-cultural lifestyle. As soon as people find out we don't own a television, we're labeled. That, alone, is enough to make an American family an anomaly.

Oddly enough, I used to think that home school kids must be socially inept because they didn't experience the "socialization" of public school. It wasn't until I taught language arts to junior high home school kids two days a week that I realized how incredibly social home school kids can be. They blew me away. They were able to relate socially to any age group. They were confident, curious, creative, kind. . .not at all what you might expect from junior high kids. I rarely had any behavioral problems. My biggest complaints were that the kids almost never wrote their names on their papers and they would often forget their homework. No bullies, loud-mouths, smart remarks, foul language, blatant disrespect. . .just a great group of kids who wanted to please their teacher--especially my first year 6th graders, who are now high school graduates. I met some truly amazing writers during the years I was at New Song Christian Academy, several of whom are still writing, getting published, and winning awards.

Not only did those kids sell me on home schooling, but they were also the catalyst for me beginning to think about becoming a mom. I've said that being a mom is the best job I've ever had. Teaching at NSCA was probably the second best job I've ever had. I had so much fun, and I dearly loved those kids. Several of them still have a special place in my heart.

Families who home school are quite a different breed. I like them. I relate to them. I connect with them. Now, I'm looking forward to emulating them. During one of the short breaks we took at the Saturday seminar, I thanked God for dropping this in my lap. He did the same thing with parenting material, exposing me to the resources before I ever needed them. In fact, we went to a Directing Vision Daily parenting workshop before Judah was ever conceived!

The lady who spoke on Saturday feels strongly about nutrition (she hasn't eaten white sugar or white flour in 30 years!), excercise (she recommends at least two nature walks a week and making the kids play outside after lunch until an hour before Dad gets home, no matter the weather), reading (her whole approach is literature-based, reading aloud to children at least an hour every day), and NOT watching television (she offered several sources that document the detrimental effects of television, particularly on developing infant/toddler brains)--basically, everything I'm already passionate about.

You can listen to a short radio interview through her website, http://www.carolejoyseid.com/index.html. She cites Dr. Raymond Moore (whose philosophy balances service, work, and study) and Charlotte Mason (who replaced textbooks with "living books" or "classics" or any book that your child begs you to read "more, please!") as predecessors and home school heroes. She also says that her home school philosophies are largely based on Francis Schaeffer's book How Should We Then Live? The Rise and Decline of Western Thought and Culture.

I realized through the workshop why I've always hated history and why I've never been able to retain it; I learned through textbooks. When I was in college, one of my history professors required us to go to the library and check out a book written during the time period we were studying. For the first time, I actually enjoyed reading about history. Later, a friend told me that one of her favorite books was The Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom. I devoured it. I often refer to it in my mind as I go about my daily life. Using a literature-based approach to home school, The Hiding Place would qualify as a history book. I can't begin to describe how excited I am about re-learning history through great books.

So now I have vision. I'm armed. I'm dangerous. I'm going to attempt to home school my children, and as the Lord leads, refer often to the principles (and book lists) I was exposed to this weekend. I just love when He weeds through all the options for me and shows me the best way for my family. HE IS SO GOOD. And I am so tired. :0)

Friday, September 21, 2007

Thoughts on Parenting

Recently, I had a conversation with a friend whose parenting style differs greatly from the way I parented Judah in the early months. She shared with me her philosophy and all the benefits that are supposed to come from her particular style of parenting. What's really interesting to me is that many of the same benefits are touted by the parenting styles I used with Judah.

Before Judah was born, I went to the local library and checked out a few parenting books. The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg really resonated with me. I also went online (in the library since we didn't have Internet access yet) and ordered a tape set and workbook (recommended by a missionary in Africa and a friend in TN) called Preparation for Parenting: Along the Infant Way by Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo. The Ezzos co-wrote the Babywise book. The Hogg & Ezzo philosophies not only resonated with me, but they also fit my personality. I needed confidence to be a parent, which is what I gleaned from the Ezzos. I also needed specific, practical advice, which is what I found with Hogg. Both philosophies suggest setting up an "EASY" (to borrow from Hogg) and flexible routine for you and your baby consisting of: Eat, Activity/awake, Sleep, You-time.

Judah fell right into a predictable routine early on, and he's been a "textbook" baby from the start, napping well during the day and sleeping 10-12 hours at night. Miriam, on the other hand, didn't start taking predictable daytime naps until she was 5 months old, and she still doesn't sleep through the night. She's now 9 months. After talking to my friend, I realized that much of what we do with our kids is "according to our faith." We read, we ask questions, we observe, we spend time with other families, and we make decisions about how to parent based on what resonates with us, what seems right to us (as we're guided by the Holy Spirit), and what we believe God is saying to us about our children.

I love being around big families and watching how they interact. More than anything, I've tried to treat Judah as if he's not the only one because I knew there would be more. Now, I'm the mommy of these two radically different little people, and I'm constantly learning about how to become better at what I do. Some days are better than others. Today started out crazy-stressful (a lovely series of cleaning up mess after mess--the last one, the fourth smoothie mess of the morning, this time with shattered glass, left me on the floor in tears) but once the kids went down for naps, I regained my sanity. Judah woke up, and we had a sweet time shelling peas on the porch while Miriam took her second nap of the day.

Now they're both sleeping, I'm blogging, James is baking, and all is right with the world. Well, except for everything that isn't.