Practice Child #1

Keep in mind that Judah is, for me, practice child number one.

I don't pretend to have this parenting thing figured out. I'm also "officially" home-schooling this year. That doesn't mean I necessarily know what I'm doing. To be honest, I'm trying to do very little. Yes, trying, as in "intentionally not doing a whole lot."

Sure, by the standards of the average American household, we do a lot. We read tons of books, we frequent the library storytimes and we watch plays and get out in nature and we look for ways to volunteer our time and resources, we paint, we draw, we color, we sculpt, we act, we create.

But I don't use flash cards. And I don't own any "Teach your child to read" books. And I don't have the alphabet pasted to my wall. And I don't have any DVD's about the ABC's.

Basically, I'm attempting what might be called "the natural method" and I've recently discovered that I'm probably considered an "unschooler." I've read a few books by Dr. Raymond Moore, a developmental psychologist and educator who advocates waiting to teach children to read until they're at least EIGHT years old. I know. It sounded preposterous to me at first, too.

However . . .

Judah is a little more than six and a half. Prior to this year, he has had ZERO interest in learning how to read. Well, I say zero, I mean, almost zero. He couldn't remember the names or sounds of letters from one minute to the next. Fortunately, I had already attended a Carole Joy Seid workshop and wasn't freaked out. She introduced me to Dr. Raymond Moore. I'm pretty sure God knew what an over-achiever I am and He wanted me to take it easy on my son. So here we are.

Tonight, while I was making hummus in the kitchen, Judah was shouting from the other room, "Mom! I know how to spell flower!" And then he would take a pretty good gander at the spelling, I'd tell him how close he was and how brilliant he is, and he would keep guessing until he got it. Later, when we was trying to spell "tomato" (te-ma-to), he said he was writing down the letters, but that wasn't "cheating." He wanted to be able to read the letters back to me without having to keep them in his mind each time. I told him that of course that's not cheating--that's good thinking.

A friend who home-schooled her children through high school had told me once--years ago--that teaching your child to read is a lot like potty-training. Just wait until he's ready and then it's pretty simple. With Judah, I spent months attempting to potty-train him, but with Miriam, I just waited until she was ready, and in a couple weeks, she was fully potty-trained. Carole Joy Seid said you can take years teaching your child to read (like robots) or wait for readiness and watch them bloom in a few months or even weeks.

On the way to visit my parents in KY on Thanksgiving, Judah sounded out the word "brand" in the car. When Miriam asked what "brand" meant, he said, "It means a specific type of thing. Like this is a specific 'brand' of chocolate." Ah, the beauty of teaching a child to read who already grasps the meaning of the words he is sounding out.

I read an article recently about how both sides of the brain have to work together to decode symbols for reading. One side tackles the symbols and the sounds and the other attaches meaning. That's why it's possible to read entire passages and not have a clue what you've just read. One side of your brain was asleep or distracted.

I'm pretty excited about Judah's attempts to sound out words and write letters and basically teach himself to read. For example, we picked up a book from the library last week, and he came home, sat down on the couch, and sounded out the title again and again and again. He was studying the letters. He was literally teaching himself to read.

He wants to read so badly he can taste it. But I know that what he figures out on his own he will carry with him for a lifetime. What I try to spoon-feed him will either be spit out or quickly forgotten.

I'm here. I'm ready to answer questions. I'll read every day and check out audio books so he can listen to books even when I'm not available. The day will come when he will be reading to me and to his younger sisters. I think that day is not far from now. I'm eager to write down the name of Judah's first read-aloud book.

But for now it's time for bed. So says the husband.

This Boy of Mine

Oh, where do I begin?

If my husband were writing this, he'd probably begin with last night's events since he was there. Apparently, when he went to pick up Judah from his class at The Anchor, one of the girls in Judah's class was crying because of Judah's retaliating drawing and remark. James brought it up this morning because he wanted me to somehow communicate with Judah about the situation.

Judah said that Sophia drew a picture of a girl pushing down boys, so he drew a picture of himself pushing down Sophia--and then he told her about it--which, of course, made her cry. Even after his teacher talked to him about it, he still didn't understand why what he did "wasn't appropriate" (his words). So I turned it around:

"What if you had drawn a picture of boys pushing down girls and then Sophia drew a picture of herself pushing you down? How would you feel?"

"Sad."

"That's why it's not appropriate. If you do something to someone else that would make you feel bad if they did it to you, then it's not appropriate. We treat people the way we want to be treated--not the way they treat us. How did Sophia respond to your drawing?"

"She didn't see it."

"How did she know about it?"

"I told her."

"And how did she respond?"

"I don't know."

"Did she laugh?"

"No."

"Did she smile?"

"No."

"Did she cry?"

"A little."

"So how do you think she felt?"

"Sad."

"Oh. So her response to your drawing was crying because it made her sad. How would you feel about writing her a letter?"

"Good . . . Where's the paper?"

I found an empty card and a pen and thought I was going to write it for him, but he sat down with it and asked me how to spell the following:

I AM SORRY FOR DRAWING A PICTURE OF PUNCHING YOU. JUDAH. I (heart symbol) SOPHIA. FROM JUDAH.

Then, as Daddy's suggested, he drew a picture of himself with Sophia fighting a monster together with swords to show that they're on the same team.

I'm not sure why this impacted me to the degree that I wanted to take the time to sit down and write it out, except that Judah hasn't been interested in writing until now, and it really surprised me that he wanted to write the card himself. A few weeks ago he wrote out a poem that he memorized, but he did it on the dry erase board and instead of James telling him each letter, he wrote it on the board and Judah copied it. This is the first time he has written this much on his own.

I also feel like he processed the situation well. I could tell that at first he was defensive, but by the time we got to writing the letter, his heart had softened and he was truly sorry for what he did. His face gives him away every time--he's so expressive.

This weekend, I think I apologized at least twice a day for my short temper. I rarely feel as if I do things "right," but I feel like we handled this one pretty well, and I wanted a reminder.

A huge thanks to the writings of Dr. Raymond Moore (School Can Wait and Homestyle Teaching books) and the teachings of Danny Silk (Loving Our Kids on Purpose CDs)--you have both saved me a ton of stress and grief.

I found my camera!

Nadia at six months, my sweet, happy, delicious baby. I often wish I could put her on "pause."

Nadia Ruth Todd, the sweetest baby on the planet

"Is she always this good?" I hear this just about every time we're out. "Yes. Always."

She is the PERFECT baby. And the main reason I rarely blog anymore.

She's six months old now, but these are five-month pics because I can't find my camera. It's here somewhere . . .

Conversations with Judah and Mira--Oct 2010

A couple days ago, my husband sent me an e-mail telling me he missed my blog. So tonight he's at a Bible study, the kids are all in bed asleep, the floors are swept, the toilet's cleaned, the laundry's mostly done, the dishes are soaking . . . and I'm in a constant state of writing in my head. I rarely find a moment during the day that I'm able to carry on a coherent conversation or write a meaningful e-mail, much less a blog post. So much mental energy must be exerted for such things. I've been giving all of mine to three little people who have been giving me excellent writing material.

Conversations with Judah and Mira . . .

Yesterday we went to Cheekwood with a group of homeschool families. When we got back, James asked me if I enjoyed my day. I said, "Yes. I got to be with some of my favorite people doing some of my favorite things--outside." And Miriam added, "Without your mom telling you what to do . . . or what not to do." (I really wish you could hear her little 3-year-old voice.)

The night before, James was working late so I let Judah climb in bed with me and snuggle after we did our bedtime routine. (Miriam fell asleep early and Nadia was already in bed.) He said, "Mom, remember in the olden days when we used to snuggle?"

I asked, "When you were two?"

"Yeah."

"Come here, you. Let me snuggle you."

As we snuggled, I said something about letting me snuggle him until he was married. He said, "I'm never going to marry." Then, in his "I'm teasing you" voice, he continued, "Why would I want a troublesome old woman hanging about me all the days of my life . . . bossing me around . . . and telling me to go to work every day. All we'd have to eat is one dry little bean. And we'd have a son named Jack and he would climb a beanstalk and . . . " we just laughed and laughed and laughed. After our little giggle-fest, I prayed for him and our friends until he fell asleep. I love that boy.

This afternoon, I heard both Miriam and Judah outside crying. When I went to find out what happened, I discovered that Judah was "leaving to live the Indian life of adventure" and they were saying their tearful goodbyes.

Judah was wearing nothing but a leather belt and a blue towel loincloth with a handmade bow and arrow strung across his back. Miriam had a sparkle sash around her head, a braid in her hair, and a purple shawl tied around her waist. That's it. No shirt. No panties. Very authentic.

Miriam was in tears, saying that Judah was going to leave--"for real--in real life." He looked at me with a tear just beginning to stream down his face, said goodbye, and started walking down the road (imagine his little naked body with a bow strung over his shoulder and a leather belt about his waist). I tried to comfort Miriam, but I couldn't stop laughing! He made his way around the perimeter of the yard. They reunited and played on the side of the house that doesn't face the street (according to my recommendation). I think we might need to move out to the country pretty soon.

"We love each uh-thuh, right Judah?" ~ Mira

Nadia laughed yesterday.

I feel like I could end this post right there. She laughed once in her sleep last week and I thought she laughed a few days ago, but now I know that I know that she laughed--the sweetest little belly laugh from precious Nadia Ruth. I'm smitten.

Right before Nadia laughed, Miriam, who was glistening with sweat, caught a glimpse of her reflection in the sideview mirror of the van and said, "Mommy! My face is all sparkly! Look!"

Just before the girls stole my heart, we were all eating lunch together when I asked Miriam if she would like to be in a fashion show. Judah said he thought she would be too shy to be in a show like that, but I assured them both that I would hold Miriam's hand so she could walk across the stage with confidence. Judah said, "Miriam! I'll bet you're going to be the most beautiful girl there!" And he means it.

My children deeply love each other.

I try not to sow any seeds of jealousy. I'm careful to say things like, "I need to put your baby sister down for a nap, but I'll be right back" instead of "I'm busy with the baby." I really want them have a sense of ownership--she's THEIR baby as much as she is mine.

Miriam loves to get diapers for me and throw away the dirty ones. Judah loves to hold his sister just about any time I ask. Miriam and Judah both love to make Nadia smile--and now laugh.

Don't get me wrong--my kids fight. They even fight over imaginary things! But they love each other a LOT. Miriam cheers Judah on as he climbs everything in sight. Judah encourages Miriam to try new things and tells her what a great job she's doing. Recently, when I told the kids I thought Nadia was getting ready for some teeth (since she's soaking all her clothes with baby drool), Judah said, "NADIA! Congratulations!"

I love it.

Sometimes they completely wear me out, but I have to admit that I have really great kids who love each other deeply, and for that, I am grateful.

Introducing...

Nadia Ruth Todd
She is one week old today. Born April 7, 2010, at 12:56 pm, via c-section after our final attempt to get her to turn. She weighed 7 lbs 11 oz and measured 20 in long. Her big brother Judah, 6, and her big sister Miriam, 3, couldn't wait to meet her. We're all delighted she's here.

Sibling Love on a Sunday Morning

This morning Judah literally hit the ground running. When he woke up, he didn't walk to the bathroom, he ran. Then he ran back to his room to find clothes. Then he ran down the hallway into my room to ask if he had any cozy pants clean. Then he ran to the laundry room to find some. Then he ran back into his room to find a shirt. Miriam woke up and asked him to stay in the room, so he said, "I can stay until it's time to go listen to my audio book." He crawled into bed with her and they started singing, "I love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck." I love when mornings begin with sibling cuddles and songs and giggles.

"You MUST play music for Miriam"

Judah recently asked me if he could listen to a Bible audiobook. I thought tonight might be a good time to try having them go to sleep while listening to the Bible being read aloud. However, I loaned my Bible on CD to a friend recently, and I can't seem to find the few CD's that weren't in the case. They're in the house--somewhere.

In my search for the stray CDs, I found Alberto and Kimberly Rivera's Peace CD and offered that instead. Judah was NOT interested, but Miriam really, really wanted to listen to it. Fortunately for Miriam, Judah fell asleep before I went downstairs to get the CD player. I put in the CD for Mira, and she said, "I wish I should dance to this song, but I can't."

I kissed her on the forehead and said, "You're right. You need to go to bed. I love you." That little girl LOVES to dance to music.

As I headed down the stairs, I was reminded again of a time when Miriam was just a few months old and the kids and I were visiting friends in Virginia. I read to Judah from his Children's Bible (illustrated by our friend Dennas Davis) about Samuel. I told him that Samuel heard from God when he was just a little boy and that Judah could hear from God, too. We prayed, and right after that, Judah said, "You must play music for Miriam." Wow. At three years old, Judah wasn't using the word "must," so I logged this one in my mind for future reference.

Now Miriam is three, and every time she hears music, she dances. I took the kids to a CD release party on Thursday, and Miriam danced to every song. Judah wasn't too thrilled with the music and wanted to leave. If someone had been reading aloud, he would have been in heaven. He fell asleep sitting up in his chair and holding my hand.

I'm fascinated by how much Miriam loves music and Judah loves the spoken word. Occasionally, Judah will join in and dance with us, but for the most part, he'd rather sit and listen to audio books while Miriam and I head upstairs and dance to music. Recently, I've been listening to some "Seeds" CDs, which are truly EXCELLENT scripture songs that are so well done that it's a pleasure to listen to them (unlike a lot of children's CDs which can grate on my nerves).

Carole Joy Seid, the speaker at the homeschool workshop I attended recently, highly recommended them and had some for sale at her seminar. Mary Keith Skinner was sitting right in front of me, and she couldn't say enough good things about them. Her husband Anthony is one of our favorite musicians and has extremely discerning taste in music, and he listens to them even when the kids aren't around. Now that I've listened to the "Seeds of Praise" and "Seeds of Purpose" CDs, I can understand why.

Check them out here: Seeds Family Worship.net. You can listen to some of the songs HERE. If you like what you hear, buy a couple CDs HERE. Each package comes with two identical CDs, so if you and a friend buy different CDs, you could give each other the extra copies and get two for the price of one. That's what Patti Smith and I did at the conference and I'm so glad we did!

Judah, the author.

My soon-to-be six-year-old, theatrical, pirate-centric, budding-writer son wrote this "book" for me Monday night after writing one for Christy. He took a brown paper sack, cut it into strips for pages, and then dictated the stories to me and to Daddy. Christy's is held together with clear duct tape and mine has a safety pin at the top. On mine, each page has a small illustration of a stick pirate or ship or both. I just noticed that the themes are very similar. Here we go!

TREASURE ISLAND by Judah Rees Todd, 2/22/10, age 5

Once up on a time, there was a pirate. His ship got destroyed by evil villains. They threw him overboard and while he was crying out for help, he went under the water altogether.

Then, as I said, the evil villains sailed away with his ship. The evil villains came upon an enchanted island. On that island there was a pile of rocks with a ring inside it. The evil villains tied their ship to the ring in the rocks.

In that pile of rocks, there was a treasure box. Then, the evil villains took the treasure box and buried it. The whole world fell to pieces and left the evil villains dead in the ruins.

The End.

***************************

This is the book for Christy. This is a book about pirates. this book is about to start.

[NOTE: he had me write that little intro on the first page and some concluding remarks on the last page.]

PIRATES DISCOVERY by Judah Rees Todd, 2/22/10, age 5

Once upon a time there lived a pirate, and he stole gold from every ship that he could set eye on. But one day he found a pile of rocks and in those rocks, a humongous treasure box. He took the treasure box on his ship, but the treasure box was too heavy, and his ship sank. And he had to swim to shore.

All his crew met him on an island. On that island, Captain Kidd's treasure was buried. They started to dig. Then, they saw the gleam of a box. And then they saw the water. The whole island fell to pieces. The pirates had a narrow escape.

They swam in the sea until they came up on a mysterious island. Then they realized--it was enchanted!

Then, a great sea serpent rose out of the sea. He was about to break the ship in two. The pirate captain clicked his fingers and called to his crew, and all the crew got their weapons in hand and cut the sea serpent to bits.

Christy, this book ends. But we would love to make you more books. The End.

Yummy Yummy Yum Balls

My friend Crystal asked me for my Yummy Yummy Yum Balls recipe, but I couldn't find it anywhere on my blog! I need to stop posting so much on Facebook and start posting more here.





THE STORY


When we were visiting Ashley and The Warren Nation in Colorado this past October, we got introduced to Yum Balls. Judah tried one and said, "You shouldn't call these Yum Balls. You should call them Yummy Yummy Yum Balls!" So that's what we call them. They've become something of a staple in our home. SOooooooOOOOOoooooo easy to make and obviously super YUMMY!





THE RECIPE for Yummy Yummy Yum Balls (from Chef Ashley Warren)

Put all ingredients into a large mixing bowl:
1 cup almond or peanut butter
1/2 cup honey
2 cups shredded unsweetened dried coconut
1 cup oat flakes (traditional rolled oats) or crispy rice or Ezekiel cereal or granola (or combo)
a pinch of salt.



Since I use the peanut/almond butter jar to measure everything (makes clean up VERY easy), my recipe looks like this:


1 jar peanut or almond butter
1/2 jar honey
2 jars coconut
1 jar oat flakes or granola
a pinch of salt if not in peanut butter or granola



Mix, roll into balls, and FREEZE. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

ADDITIONAL MIX-INS
Other ideas for adding flavor and/or nutrients:
flax seed meal (ground flax seeds)
ground nuts (almonds, pecans, cashews, walnuts, hazelnuts, pistachios . . . )
wheat germ
cacao nibs
carob chips
dried fruit bits
chocolate chips (all natural, of course)



I like to change it up every time and use what we have on hand. They're ALWAYS yummy!

NOTE
I usually separate each layer of the balls with parchment paper to keep the ones on top from sticking to the ones on the bottom. I don't leave space inbetween each one since breaking them apart is super easy.

******************************************

For more ideas, here's a link to some Almond Butter Balls (and the place that found the picture):


http://thebrassicadiaries.wordpress.com/2009/03/20/almond-butter-balls/

Homemade Granola sans Shellac

Well, I did it. I made the homemade granola from this site:
http://allrecipes.com/HowTo/Great-Granola/Detail.aspx

Oh, WOW, it's good. I chose the cherry/almond/coconut flavor, used coconut oil in the wet ingredients, and baked it for 30 minutes total, adding the cherries after 20 minutes. DELICIOUS.

Next time I make homemade granola or granola bars, I'm doubling or tripling the recipe.

Oh, and my granola happens to contain ZERO grams of shellac.

Shellac? Yep.

You see, I've influenced a few friends and family members with my label-reading obsession, one of whom found SHELLAC listed as an ingredient in a box of granola bars. Thinking it was some sort of varnish (to make the granola bars shiny) but not really sure what it was made from, we looked it up in my handy unabridged dictionary.

Shellac is "lac that has been purified and formed into thin sheets, used for making varnish."

Well, we couldn't stop there, of course. We had to find out the definition of "lac," too, which happens to be "a resinous secretion of the lac insect deposited on trees and used in making shellac."

Not everything used in the production of processed and packaged foods is actually food.

Label-readers, unite!

Homemade Granola Bars = MMMMMMMM

I made homemade granola bars again yesterday. They are SO SO SO good. I don't want to lose the recipe, so I'm posting it here:

http://www.joyfulabode.com/2008/04/11/homemade-granola-bar-recipe-no-high-fructose-corn-syrup-in-these-bars/ (picture is also from joyfulabode.com)

Basically, you toast the dry ingredients (you could do a "raw" version and forego the toasting--the flavor is a bit different but both ways are good), heat the butter (use REAL butter!!!) and brown sugar and honey (I used about a third of what it calls for since I made them before and they were plenty sweet and sticky) and then mix the wet and dry ingredients together, press the mixture into a pan with parchment paper, let it cool, and cut into bars. SO EASY.

This time I used pecans instead of almonds (the recipe calls for peanuts but I haven't tried those yet) and dried cherries instead of dried apricots (recipe just says dried fruit). Last time I used 1 tsp of almond extract and 1 tsp of vanilla. Mmmmmm.

I also did part flaxseed meal instead of the full 3/4 cup wheat germ both times and threw in two handfuls of whole flaxseeds this time. I also added a small handful of all-natural chocolate chips and cacao nibs this time. I'm sure I made other substitutions, but I don't remember them right now.

I want to try making this granola next:

http://allrecipes.com/HowTo/Great-Granola/Detail.aspx

Addendum to "Today, I heal."

ADDENDUM to "Today, I heal." Throughout the day, I've been thinking not only about some of the challenges we faced this week, but also some of the ways that Judah really rose to the challenge and showed increased maturity and responsibility.

For example, our first challenge came when we discovered that our massage therapist friend Gretchen had wrenched her neck and couldn't offer to help until she healed. Jennifer, the second LMT friend we called, had given up her practice due to some health-related issues, and Carole, the LMT we finally reached, couldn't come to my house on Sunday but could fit me in on Monday night at her house. That meant all day Sunday and all day Monday in unrelenting pain.

Both Gretchen and Carole recommended taking a warm bath with Epsom Salts, so that's exactly what I did on Sunday night when the pain got so bad that I just couldn't take it anymore. In fact, warm baths helped offer some relief in between massages.

Why not just load up on pain meds? Well, I tend to feel better pressing through being sick versus taking medicine for symptoms (I usually feel worse on the medicine), but this time I took half a dose of Tylenol pain reliever every morning and every night. Plus, I have a sweet little baby growing in my belly and want to be sensitive to her needs and development, too. I don't know if the Tylenol helped, but I do know that the baths and massages did!

On to the next challenge . . . normally, if I can't be fully Mom to my kids, my husband will take up my slack or be present in my absence. Not this week. He has literally been working from sunup to sundown--and then some--just trying to keep up with the load on his plate. He normally has a lot more flexibility, but work for him right now is unusually busy and will continue to be through next week. This was probably the worst possible time for me to be out of commission.

In the case that neither of us is available, Christy can usually hang with the kids, but she's been doing a trial run with a full-time job this week. We generally schedule "Mommy Time" for me during one day each week, but she didn't even have that to give. Instead, she offered two evenings. The first one was the night James took Judah to his friend's house and then James spent some time with a friend, so it was just me and Miriam hanging out until Christy got home.

To help assuage Miriam's disappointment in not being able to go with Judah, I offered the first movie of the week (oh, yet another challenge--I can't just put my kids in front of the TV since we don't have one, and my computer, on which we typically watch DVDs, was infected with a terrible virus on Friday before all this started). It took a while, but we finally got Curious George to play. Midway through the movie, Miriam asked if we could read a book instead. That's my girl!

Naturally, since my mom only lives an hour and a half from us, my friend Rachel asked if she could come and help . . . well, the challenge there was that my mom had two of my sister's three kids from Thursday-Saturday since my sister and her husband were out of town at a youth leaders' conference.

We had planned to have my parents come over on Sunday to celebrate their birthdays (they were actually born on the same day of the same month of the same year in the same hour!) but it snowed. And snowed. And snowed. And snowed some more. Which is, of course, the next challenge, preventing two more friends from coming out to help.

Finally, the day that Christen came over, I discovered that the heating element went out on our dryer. The next day, Christy tried to make popcorn, but the burner would keep shutting off. I think there's a short in the electrical connection which might be fixed by replacing the burner. I hope. The challenges abound this week!

However, in the midst of all the challenges, my son Judah, who is fast approaching six-years-old, showed me that he and his little sister Miriam, who just turned three, can unload the dishwasher without supervision. They left the plates and bowls stacked on the counter, but they managed to put away all the other dishes. Judah said he climbed up and put the glasses away, which was more than I expected!

Believe it or not, he and Miriam actually fight over who gets to put the silverware away! I did a little "experiment" with them a couple weeks ago to see if they could put the dishes away--I told them I wanted to see if they were "old enough and responsible enough yet to do something so grown-up." I gave Judah the responsibility of putting away the silverware, and Miriam cried because she didn't get to do it. The next "experiment" left Judah in tears because Miriam didn't leave any silverware for him to put away. I'm not kidding. These kids really like being given responsibility!

So, not only do I now have little people to put dishes away, but I also discovered that Judah is fully capable of heating frozen lima beans. He wanted some for lunch, but I was trying not to do anything and James was upstairs working, so I read the package directions and he did the rest. From start to finish, he "made lunch" for himself, his sister, and his mom. He was so proud, and so was I. Go, Judah!

This afternoon, Judah came in from playing in the snow and said, "Mom, I've seen what yellow snow looks like."

"Probably means a dog peed in it," I said, thinking, "I hope you didn't try it!"

He replied, "Or a human," and grinned.

I asked, "A human named Judah?"

We smiled knowingly at each other. That kid.

Today, I heal.

(NOTE: the picture is from 2006, when I was pregnant with Miriam, approximately as far along as I am now. I just realized that I don't have any pictures yet of my "Nadia Ruth Belly"!)

Last night marks the first night of the week spent in my own bed, the first full night of sleep I've had all week (well, as "full" as is possible at 7 months pregnant), and the first night I didn't have to get up at 1:30 or 2:00 AM and stretch for an hour until the back pain subsided enough to lie back down and try to get a bit more sleep.

I have a newly discovered compassion for women on bed-rest as well as those who suffer from chronic back pain. The pain I experienced this week can be likened to back labor during delivery or kidney stone pain. Excruciating. Debilitating. Horrendous. Make-it-go-away-PLEASE-kind of pain. I was telling my friend Rachel, who has dealt with chronic back pain, that I didn't even have an appetite because it's terribly difficult to eat when it feels as though someone is standing behind you incessantly pounding on your back with a hammer. When my appetite came back, I knew I was on the mend.

So I think it started because of a variety of reasons:
1) I'm 7 months pregnant. My little baby belly is not so little anymore.
2) Miriam was sick from Friday night all through the next day (Saturday) of last week. She complained of her legs hurting, so when she needed to pee, I would pick her up from her bed, take her to the potty, and try to prevent her from standing for any length of time. James had Judah at Davis Kidd all day, so I was Mira's only option for getting around without tears. I ended up carrying her up and down the steps several times. I also got up several times during the night to help her. I'm sure I put WAY too much strain on my back.
3) Saturday night I was coughing, so I propped up on two large pillows, which is generally not comfortable for me, but I was finally able to get to sleep.
4) Then, Miriam asked to sleep in my bed. I thought it would be a lot easier to take her to the potty or check on her if she were right there, so I conceded. I woke up in some pretty crazy positions, like barely hanging off the side of the bed with her feet on my belly, so I needing to move her several times (again, putting more strain on my back).
5) So Sunday, I was in so much pain that I started contacting massage therapists. Sunday night I couldn't lie down--at all. I slept sitting up on the couch, putting a whole lot of pressure on my lower back and hips, and waking up every 30 minutes or so to stretch my neck and back. By Monday I was desperate for help.

My extraordinary midwife Heather came to the rescue on Monday. She brought her massage table and chair for me to borrow until I no longer needed them, she rubbed my back, and she took me to Carole, a professional massage therapist, that night. (Carole is my friend Christen's mom. When we spent some time together recently, Christen told me about how much she recommended her mom and to keep her in mind if ever I needed a massage.)

Heather stayed through the hour-long massage then took me back home and helped me get in a semi-comfortable position on the massage table by having me lay on my side and propping up my leg with three pillows and my arm with three pillows. She said that if I needed a massage every day, she would be available to do it. Amazing.

My friend Wendy came over on Tuesday morning, swept the living room and kitchen floors, wiped down the kitchen counters, and made some tea for me. Her visit was the perfect distraction and really helped lift my spirits. If you've ever dealt with chronic pain, you know how easy it is to slip into a depressive state.

On Tuesday afternoon (was it Tuesday? the days are running together), my friend Ruthie took the kids and came back hours later with my two happy children, her precious one-year-old daughter, homemade cookies, and dinner for all of us. Apparently the girls took naps while Judah listened to an audio book, so Ruthie was able to accomplish much in the kitchen. What a huge blessing she was--not only did I get a hot bath, a light massage by my fabulous midwife, and a nap while she was gone, but I also had dinner made when I woke up. Amazing.

Tuesday night I started feeling a little better. The pain around my shoulder blades had begun to subside, but my lower back and hips had started to ache as if I were having back labor.

On Wednesday, our friend Michelle came over and helped with the kids and the kitchen. Judah was asleep when she arrived, but Miriam was thrilled that she finally had someone to hold her.

By Wednesday afternoon, I had regained somewhat of an appetite. While Michelle played with Miriam upstairs, I got a much-needed nap and then put together a savory chicken salad with lots of fresh garlic, Kalamata olives, sundried tomatoes, heirloom cherry tomatoes, toasted pine nuts, extra virgin olive oil, sea salt, fresh-cracked pepper, a touch of rosemary, and a shake of freshly-grated parmesan cheese. Mmmmmm. I ate the whole thing!

After I took a hot shower, it actually crossed my mind to put on some make-up and maybe go somewhere. Of course, I was in no shape to go anywhere, but the fact that it crossed my mind was HUGE. Prior to that moment, I wasn't able to think past the pain I was experiencing. By then, it had been a full week since I had driven my van. The only time I left the house was to go to the massage on Monday, and Heather my midwife did the driving.

Wednesday night I had another professional massage with Carole, which I think did wonders for my body. She came to my house at around 8 PM and let me go right to sleep afterward (again, propped up with pillows on the massage table in the living room). It took about 24 hours to really feel the effects of each massage, but when the relief came, it was more than welcome!

Thursday morning Christen came over, took me to Wendy's house to drop off the kids, and then carted me to Bellevue for a chiropractic appointment where my midwife met me. Christen waited for over an hour while I received a chiropractic adjustment and massage. Wow.

Lisa, the chiropractor, has known my midwife for 18 years and has had four home-births. She said that each massage had done wonders to get me loosened up enough for her to work on me and adjusted me back to a "normal" state. Now it was up to me to rest and allow my body to heal. Two more days, she said, of lying around, not doing any housework and not reaching for anything. (I'll try!)

Christen drove me to Wendy's again to pick up the kids, then we went to Calypso for a super-yummy lunch. When we got back home, Christen stayed and played with the kids while I rested. I managed to sneak in a nap. Before she left that night, she made a delicious smoothie for me and cleaned up the kitchen. She even offered to rotate the laundry and do anything else that I might need. The kids enjoyed her so much that they said loved her more than they loved their own mother and wished she were their mother!

That afternoon, Judah was invited to spend the night with his friend Micah. He was so excited about going that he pulled all his stuff together and sat on the couch waiting patiently for Daddy to take him. This was his first friend-sleepover and the first time his friend Micah had a friend spend the night, too. (Micah has two older brothers and two younger sisters and happens to be exactly the same age as Judah. They get along famously.)

James got a much-needed break by going to his friend Nathan's house while Miriam and I snuggled on the couch. Heather, my midwife, came to do my prenatal exam and said everything having to do with the baby looks perfect (blood pressure, weight, urine test, baby's heartbeat, measurement of the ever-expanding belly, etc.).

Right after Heather left, Christy brought me the glorious fish special from Kalamata's. We sat down to eat together and then it was time to recline on the massage table yet again. Christy took Miriam upstairs for a bath, washed her hair, combed out the terrible rat's nest (somehow Mira ends up with a horrible rat's nest in the back of her hair every time she wears a fleece hoodie or jacket), and put her to bed. The previous two nights, Miriam slept on the couch near me while Judah slept with James upstairs. It was wonderful not to be aware of her every move throughout the night!

That night I shifted around a lot, but I only had about 30 minutes in the middle of the night that caused me to get up and try to stretch out to relieve the pain near my left kidney. I even got three consecutive hours of sleep! WooHoo!!!

Friday morning brought snow, snow, and more snow. In fact, it took James over twice as long to go pick up Judah as it normally would because the roads were so bad between here and Franklin. When Judah arrived home, he and I snuggled on the couch for a while. Staying up late giggling and playing with his friend in the snow really wore him out! That night, Micah called Judah. It was really cute to hear him chatting for a minute with his friend on the phone.

Friday night was spent on the couch having a "date night" with my husband. We didn't go anywhere, but we actually looked at each other and talked to each other for the longest period of time we've had together all week (he's been working crazy hours--literally morning, noon and night--and I've been laid up in pain).

I attempted sleeping in my own bed last night and was met with SUCCESS!!! I only got up to pee once. Shifting from side to side wasn't nearly as complicated with one pillow versus six, and I never had to pace the floor or sit or stretch to alleviate back pain. I stayed in bed all night and woke up just before 8 AM feeling comfortable, refreshed, and rested--for the first time in over a week. Wow.

So here I am. It's Saturday, and I'm trying to continue to rest. It's not easy--especially when I'm looking at all the things that need to be done and reading about all the preparations that need to be made for our upcoming homebirth. But I know it's worth it. I don't want to move backward. I want only to move forward toward 100% recovery. And if I ever find myself with an opportunity to serve someone who is dealing with chronic pain or bedrest, I'll definitely follow in the example of all the dear friends who helped me this week. THANK YOU!!!

I also want to thank the friends (Chanell & Rachel) and family (Mom!) who offered to help but who were stopped by this huge snowstorm. Ashley deserves thanks for turning us on to Vitalzym, a nutritional systemic enzyme supplement that she calls a "chiropractor in a box." I also want to publicly thank everyone who prayed for my recovery. I really started seeing marked improvement--especially emotionally--when I reached out via text and asked for prayer. That's when the fog began to lift and I began to experience hope for full recovery.

Oh, and thanks to A Charlotte Mason Companion for keeping me company this week. From Karen Andreola's book, I read and memorized this verse, "Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer" (boldface mine).

As my midwife said this week, there is LIFE to be found in the Word. I definitely experienced life this week through the written word, the scriptures, and my treasured friends and family.

Today, I heal.

Fiddler next month and Europe this summer!

Know someone who wants to travel internationally with a group of super fun people and benefit from the wisdom of a fabulous multi-lingual tour guide by the name of David Durham? World to the Wise is heading to Europe this June/July to visit London, Paris, and Amsterdam.

Check out all the details at http://worldtothewise.blogspot.com/. If you or your friends sign up by January 28, you'll have help with fundraising thanks to the upcoming performances of Fiddler on the Roof (the first weekend is completely sold out!)

FIDDLER ON THE ROOF details (pics and movies on Facebook)

Lifesong Theatre Group presents: Fiddler on the Roof

Based on Sholem Aleichem stories by special permission of Arnold Perl.

Book by Joseph Stein, Music by Jerry Bock, Lyrics by Sheldon Harnick.

Original New York Stage Production Directed and Choreographed by Jerome Robbins.

All performances in the old chapel at Belmont Church, 68 Music Square E., Nashville 37203

Fri. Jan. 29 7:30 pm SOLD OUT!

Sat. Jan. 30 7:30 pm SOLD OUT!

Sun. Jan. 31 2:00 pm SOLD OUT!

Thurs. Feb. 4 7:30 pm

Fri. Feb. 5 7:30 pm

Sat. Feb. 6 7:30 pm

Tickets: $5 each

Send e-mail with name, desired performance date, and number of tickets to: lifesongtickets@gmail.com

Directed by Alice Griffith

Choreographed by Jamie Kearney

Starring David Durham as Tevye

Fiddler on the Roof is presented through special arrangement with Music Theatre International (MTI). All authorized performance materials are also supplied by MTI. 421 West 54th Street, New York, NY 10019, Phone: 212-541-4684 Fax 212-397-4684, http://www.mtishows.com/

Home-education Seminar coming to Franklin, TN

A friend of mine who homeschooled her two boys through high school sent me the following info for my first Carole Joy Seid seminar, which motivated me even more to home-educate my children using a literature-based approach, which basically means we continue doing much of what enjoy most--reading great books!

Nina said that she wished she had known about seminars like Carole's when her boys were very young. (If you didn't already know, teaching junior high language arts at New Song Christian Academy is what sold me on homeschooling--those kids were and continue to be some of the most amazing people I've ever met. They even opened my heart to having children of my own!)

I'm currently reading the Charlotte Mason Companion: Personal Reflections on the Gentle Art of Learning by Karen Andreola and LOVE IT (a huge "Thank You" goes to homeschool mama extraordinaire Valda Christensen for giving it to me!). At the last seminar I attended, I discovered that Carole's homeschool philosophy is based largely on the teachings of Charlotte Mason.

The first book I read about home education was recommended by Carole Joy Seid, and I have found it invaluable--definitely worth reading again and again: For the Children's Sake: Foundations of Education for Home and School by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay. Carole Joy Seid's book list alone is worth the price of admission, but her tried-and-true homeschool philosophy is so liberating that I had to pass it on!

*********************************************

From: Elizabeth Pedersen

Sent: Wed, January 20, 2010 4:46:07 PM

Subject: Carole Seid seminar coming Feb 27th

Dear faithful families,

Did you go to Carole's seminar last fall in Franklin? Were you very encouraged then, but you left your joy and vision behind somewhere?

Well, Carole Joy Seid's "Basic" seminar is coming Feb. 27th to Christ Community Church in Franklin, TN to give you just what you need!!! A mid-winter lift!!!

Invite your friends who need to hear Carole's unique educational philosophy. This is "A Literature Based Approach to Education." There is something for anyone even if you are not homeschooling. "Books, books and more great books"

With Carole Seid's valuable handouts only available for seminar attendees, you can homeschool with only a Bible, library card and a math program. (Good news to anyone !!)

Learn how to make your children lovers of books while you win their hearts for Christ.

Register from the attached flyer [e-mail or call Lori for flyer that was attached to e-mail] or go to http://www.carolejoyseid.com/. $45 to preregister by Feb. 12th or $55 at the door.

God bless you richly!! Elizabeth

" . . . and implored him to exert himself."

Thanks to my mom, who loves a good yard-sale, we have a book of Andersen Fairy Tales that was published in 1937 but must have been written before 1875, the year that Hans Christian Andersen died. Beginning on page 81 is "Cinderella or The Little Glass Slipper." The story concludes with this passage:

And now her two sisters found her to be that fine beautiful lady whom they had seen at the ball. They threw themselves at her feet, to beg pardon for all the ill treatment they had made her undergo. Cinderella took them up, and as she embraced them, cried that she forgave them with all her heart, and desired them always to love her.

Prior to this passage, we learn that:

The King's son conducted her to the most honourable seat, and afterwards took her out to dance with him: she danced so very gracefully, that they all more and more admired her. A fine collation was served up, whereof the young Prince ate not a morsel, so intently was he busied in gazing on her. She went and sat down by her sisters, showing them a thousand civilities, giving them part of the oranges and citrons which the Prince had presented her with; which very much surprised them, for they did not know her.

While Cinderella was thus amusing her sisters, she heard the clock strike eleven and three quarters, whereupon she immediately made a curtsey to the company, and hasted away as fast as she could.

Call me old fashioned, but I would a hundred times rather read this version of "Cinderella" to my kids than the newer, watered-down, popular version. It pains me to read some of the books they ask me to read at the library and at Davis Kidd. Sometimes I refuse to read the ones that are truly pathetic (by my standards, of course), and sometimes I go ahead and read some of them and cringe, making a mental note never to read them again.

As Carole Joy Seid says, "Life is too short for mediocre books." I completely agree. In fact, I recently finished the book Honey for a Child's Heart by Gladys Hunt and feel as though I could have written parts of it myself--especially when the author got excited about this line from Beatrix Potter's "The Tale of Peter Rabbit"(originally published in 1901):

Peter gave himself up for lost, and shed big tears; but his sobs were overheard by some friendly sparrows, who flew to him in great excitement, and implored him to exert himself.

I love that line! I have read those perfectly placed, glorious words over and over again. I've read them aloud to my children, to my husband, to myself . . . and have found great joy every single time. Did you know that Ms. Potter's books have been translated into almost every major language and have never been out of print? EXCELLENCE deserves not only to be preserved but also to be read over and over again, generation after generation.

We're currently listening to the third and final CD from the audiobook Tales of Beatrix Potter, checked out from the library last week, read by Nadia May, who has a delightful British accent. In fact, the CD ended just now. Judah spent four uninterrupted hours of listening to stories that were written in the early 1900's while Miriam napped and Mommy got some reading and blogging accomplished. Even on "rest" days, I love knowing that my son's vocabulary is being developed and the themes in these treasured stories are being planted in his heart and mind.

December 2009 Memories

My favorite Mira quotes/rewritten songs from this week: "We wish you a Mary Poppins" and "I'm a little princess, short and stout."

Mostly for my own journaling (and for your reading pleasure, of course), here are my kid-related status updates on Facebook from December:

December 23, 2009

My children spent the morning creating pirate ships and houses from empty boxes and drinking "rum" from empty bottles (yo ho ho and a bottle of rum)--thanks to the recycling still being in the hallway this morning. Who needs new stuff when you have inventive, resourceful, creative children?

December 21, 2009

One of Judah's favorite desserts is "Cranberry Lay," otherwise known as creme brulee.

December 16, 2009

My little Miriam was born exactly three years ago today! She asked Judah and me to sing "Happy Birthday" to her again and again this morning after Grandaddy called and sang to her.

December 14, 2009

Miriam just said in her pretending voice, "Excuse me, Princess Mah-thah. Could you move so I can sit next to you for a minute? Thank you, Princess Mah-thah. I like you, Princess Mah-thah. Kiss me." Then, we took turns kissing each other on the cheek. She cracks me up!

December 11, 2009

My son is a professional maker of weapons and my daughter is the queen of spotting beautiful, shiny, sparkly, princessy things. They're helping me to embrace adventure and beauty in bigger and bigger ways as they continue to grow. I love it.

December 7, 2009

Conversation with Miriam: I said, "Oh, Miriam, you're so sweet, I just want to eat you!" She said, "You can't eat me. I'm you-ah friend!"

December 4, 2009
Things I didn't expect to do today:

Judah was pretending Miriam was his puppy dog and leading her around by the ribbons on the back of her dress. When he tied her to the fridge and she pulled the knots tight, I didn't expect to spend 10 minutes getting her free! (My mom responded, "Reminds me of when Judah tied himself to the bakers rack...his solution was to cut him free.")

Yesterday I was downstairs getting ready to walk out the door when I heard a crash and the worst scream come from Miriam who was upstairs. I bolted up the stairs, pushed Judah out of the way, bruised my knees falling up the stairs, and found little Mira tucked between Judah's bed and the dresser. She couldn't find her tights in the bottom drawer, ... See Moreso she stood on it to look in a drawer that was higher. The dresser came crashing down with her on it, bruising her little arm and hurting her finger (fortunately, Judah's bed prevented any more damage!) I didn't expect to pull a dresser away from my screaming child and hold her until she recovered.

December 2, 2009

love love love it when I make a super-charged smoothie and my children beg each other, "Don't drink the whole thing!" When I look up, it's almost gone, and they have no idea they've just devoured fresh spinach, cashews, coconut oil, clementines, mangoes, strawberries, kombucha, etc. . . . building up those little immune systems!