"Mommy Songbird"

My friend Gaynell wrote an article that was recently published in a Nashville parenting magazine. She gave me permission to post it on my blog.

"Mommy Songbird" by Gaynell Payne

I’m one of those people who hates the sound of her own voice. The one who spends a whole weekend and resorts to gimmicks to record a simple 5 second message on her answering machine. So when I read, shortly after my son was born, that my newborn preferred his mother’s voice more than anyone else’s, I was skeptical. Surely this isn’t always the case. Perhaps it’s true of say, Celine Dion’s lucky baby.

But I took it to heart and began to babble in earnest to my baby. Because whatever made him happier, I was ready to give. And in spite of my misgivings, he seemed to like it.

I was later told that not only did he like it when I talked to him, but he’d love it if I sang to him! Now that was going too far. No one liked to hear me sing. The only time I sang was in my car driving down the interstate, windows rolled up and stereo so loud I couldn’t even hear myself. Surely my sweet angel couldn’t be so tone deaf.

But I tried it. Softly at first, as not to frighten him with my banshee wails. Then I witnessed something strange. His eyes would light up – I swear they did. He’d calm if he’d been fussy. Sometimes he’d smile. He – liked – it!

Babies not only prefer the sound of their mother’s voice above all else (eat your heart out, Bing Crosby), but they learn from listening to mommy better than anyone else. That means that you can plop them in front of Sesame Street all day long, but they’ll learn the alphabet much faster if they hear it from you. Mommy’s even more fascinating than Snuffleupagus.

When parents take the time to “chatter” – talking about your day, describing what you’re doing as you do it, explaining what will happen next – your child’s world is expanding with every sentence.

Music especially holds a fascination for all ages. As you sing songs to your child he’s learning about language, communication, and the world around him. Using hand movements gives him an opportunity to “communicate” in song before he can speak and helps promote motor skills.

Now I sing all the time. I even imagine that I’ve learned how to (mostly) stay in key. My efforts have already been richly rewarded. When I sing, my 16 month old loudly “sings” with me. Even more off-key and out of tune than I do. It is absolutely the most beautiful sound in the world. When I sing the ABC’s he sings “bee beee beee deeee!” with gusto. He’s fascinated with all things musical, even making me stop on the arts channel to hear the orchestra. When I play the stereo we both sing and dance along to Bing Crosby.

It is likely that I will always only have a fan base of one. Record labels won’t be knocking on my door, music halls won’t be sold out in my name. But in my son’s eyes I am a songbird just for him. And that is reason enough to sing.